Understanding and Promoting Resiliency in Youth (Parents & Families)
By: T. Medrano
Adults tend to idealize childhood and adolescence as a carefree time. However, children and youth often face many challenges and risks, such as poverty, divorce, illness, bullying, and even abuse at home. The reason why some children and youth thrive despite facing many risks and challenges is resilience. Masten (as cited in Perkins, Borden, Keith, Hoppe-Rooney, & Villaruel 2003) defines resilience as “the ability of individuals to withstand the stressors of life and the challenges to their healthy development”.
Resilient children and youth do not have extraordinary abilities (Jensen, 2010). The main difference between youth who thrive despite risks and those who don’t is internal and external protective factors (Lee, Cheung &Kwong, 2012).
Internal protective factors are internal strengths in the youth. These are personal traits, attitudes, and beliefs. Some of the internal factors that have been identified in resilient youth are optimism, self-confidence, a strong religious faith, intelligence, and a clear and positive identity.External protective factors can be found in the home, school, and community environments.
Experts have identified three key external protective factors that apply to each of these environments: (1) caringrelationships; (2) positive and high expectations; and (3) opportunities for meaningful participation (Lee et al., 2012).
Understanding the risks and protective factors in your youth’s life is the first step that you, as a parent or family member, can take to promote resiliency in your youth. Bringing together all the people in your youth’s environment who know and care about him or her is the next step. In fact, collaboration among families, schools, and community agencies may be the only effective means to addressing the complex problems of many youth (Christle, Harley, Nelson&Jones, n.d.).
As a parent there are specific things you can do to promote resiliency in your youth. The following are some tips from the American Psychological Association (APA):
Developing resilience is a personal journey. An approach to building resilience that works for one youth may not work for another. If your youth seems overwhelmed and unable to cope, and use the tips listed above, encourage them to talk to someone they trust, like a family member, teacher, coach, or youth minister. Youth may also want to consider talking to a counselor or psychologist. Turning to someone for guidance may help them strengthen resilience and persevere during times of stress or trauma.
References
American Psychological Association (2012).Resilience guide for parents and teachers. Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/resilience.aspx#
Arnett, J. J. (2010). Adolescence and emerging adulthood. A cultural approach (4th ed., pp. 390-391). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Prentice Hall.
Christle, C. A. Harley, D. A., Nelson, M. Jones, K. (n.d.). Promoting resilience in children: What parents can do. Information for Families.Center for Effective Collaboration and Practice.University of Kentucky. Retrieved from http://cecp.air.org/familybriefs/docs/Resiliency1.pdf
Lee, T. Y., Cheung, C. K., Kwong, W. M. (2012). Resilience as a positive youth development construct: A conceptual review. Scientific World Journal.doi: 10.1100/2012/390450.
Perkins, D. F., Borden, L. M., Keith, J. G., Hoppe-Rooney, T. L., &Villaruel, F. A. (2003). Community youth development: Partnership creating a positive world. In F. A. Villaruel, D. F. Perkins, L.M. Borden, J. G. Keith (Eds.). Community Youth Development: Programs, policies, and practices (pp. 1-20). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications.
Resilient children and youth do not have extraordinary abilities (Jensen, 2010). The main difference between youth who thrive despite risks and those who don’t is internal and external protective factors (Lee, Cheung &Kwong, 2012).
Internal protective factors are internal strengths in the youth. These are personal traits, attitudes, and beliefs. Some of the internal factors that have been identified in resilient youth are optimism, self-confidence, a strong religious faith, intelligence, and a clear and positive identity.External protective factors can be found in the home, school, and community environments.
Experts have identified three key external protective factors that apply to each of these environments: (1) caringrelationships; (2) positive and high expectations; and (3) opportunities for meaningful participation (Lee et al., 2012).
Understanding the risks and protective factors in your youth’s life is the first step that you, as a parent or family member, can take to promote resiliency in your youth. Bringing together all the people in your youth’s environment who know and care about him or her is the next step. In fact, collaboration among families, schools, and community agencies may be the only effective means to addressing the complex problems of many youth (Christle, Harley, Nelson&Jones, n.d.).
As a parent there are specific things you can do to promote resiliency in your youth. The following are some tips from the American Psychological Association (APA):
- Encourage your youth to make connections: Connecting with people provides social support and strengthens resilience. Encourage your youth to be a friend in order to make friends. Build a strong family network to support your youth through their inevitable disappointments and hurts. Help your youth find comfort by connecting with a higher power, whether through organized religion or privately.
- Help your youth by having them help others: Youth who may feel helpless can be empowered by helping others. Help your youth engage in volunteer work.
- Teach your youth self-care: Teach your youth the importance of making time to eat properly, exercise, and rest by making yourself a good example. Caring for themselves, and even having fun, will help your youth stay balanced and deal better with stressful times.
- Move toward your goals: Teach your youth to set reasonable goals and move toward them one step at a time. Moving toward that goal - even if it's a tiny step - and receiving praise for doing so, will focus your youth on what they have accomplished rather than on what hasn't been accomplished, and can help build the resilience to move forward in the face of challenges.
- Nurture a positive self-view: Help your youth remember ways that they have successfully handled hardships in the past, and help them understand that those past challenges will allow them to build the strength to handle future challenges. Help your youth learn to trust themselves to solve problems and make appropriate decisions. Teach your youth to see the humor in life, and the ability to laugh at one's self.
- Keep things in perspective and maintain a hopeful outlook: Even when your youth is facing very painful events, help them look at the situation in a broader context and keep a long-term perspective, to see that there is a future beyond the current situation, and that the future can be good. An optimistic and positive outlook enables your youth to see the good things in life and keep going even in the hardest times.
- Accept that change is part of living: Change can often be scary for youth. Help your youth see that change is part of life and new goals can replace goals that have become unattainable.
Developing resilience is a personal journey. An approach to building resilience that works for one youth may not work for another. If your youth seems overwhelmed and unable to cope, and use the tips listed above, encourage them to talk to someone they trust, like a family member, teacher, coach, or youth minister. Youth may also want to consider talking to a counselor or psychologist. Turning to someone for guidance may help them strengthen resilience and persevere during times of stress or trauma.
References
American Psychological Association (2012).Resilience guide for parents and teachers. Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/resilience.aspx#
Arnett, J. J. (2010). Adolescence and emerging adulthood. A cultural approach (4th ed., pp. 390-391). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Prentice Hall.
Christle, C. A. Harley, D. A., Nelson, M. Jones, K. (n.d.). Promoting resilience in children: What parents can do. Information for Families.Center for Effective Collaboration and Practice.University of Kentucky. Retrieved from http://cecp.air.org/familybriefs/docs/Resiliency1.pdf
Lee, T. Y., Cheung, C. K., Kwong, W. M. (2012). Resilience as a positive youth development construct: A conceptual review. Scientific World Journal.doi: 10.1100/2012/390450.
Perkins, D. F., Borden, L. M., Keith, J. G., Hoppe-Rooney, T. L., &Villaruel, F. A. (2003). Community youth development: Partnership creating a positive world. In F. A. Villaruel, D. F. Perkins, L.M. Borden, J. G. Keith (Eds.). Community Youth Development: Programs, policies, and practices (pp. 1-20). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage Publications.